The Key Habit

Stay for ninety seconds.

An urge rises, peaks and falls on its own. You have never watched one all the way through. This is the watching.

Ninety seconds

Four in, two held, six out.

Put the phone down face up where you can glance at it, or close your eyes and follow the buzz. Nothing here needs you to do anything else.

If you are still on your feet afterwards

  1. Leave the room you are in.
  2. Put the phone somewhere you have to walk to.
  3. Drink a glass of water.
  4. Do the next ordinary thing: dishes, a walk, a message to a friend about nothing.

If it is heavier than an urge

A low that does not lift, or thoughts of hurting yourself, are not things to breathe through alone. The help page lists people you can call now.